Sunday, November 2, 2014

Why You Don't Need to Worry About the End of the World


I got a bit depressed last week after reading an article in a science magazine. Apparently, our galaxy - the Milky Way - is just about to get swallowed up by Andromeda. Of course, 'just about to' in cosmic terms means in another 5 billion years. A scientist friend of mine then reassured me that our own sun would already have gone super nova by then anyway. So unless we've found a way to transfer human consciousness into a body more suited for interstellar travel by then, we'll already be cinders.

I decided to undertake a straw poll of Armageddon countdown scenarios for our species.

A philosopher says civilisation will have disintegrated by the end of this century, and cannibalism will be rife among the animalistic survivors.

The environmentalists say global warming will screw us by 2050.

Some medical folks believe antibiotics will prove ineffective against a worldwide super bug within 20 years.

My wife tells me I don't need to worry about any of these things because if I don't get the outside wall painted in the next few days, she is going to kill me. 

Strangely enough, the brand label on the paint tin is 'Andromeda'.

Funny how things connect, isn't it?



4 comments:

  1. Amusing, charming, erudite, and otherwise too 'brain challenging'! :-)

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  2. The problem is, BR, that our brains can't expand as fast as the Universe ;)

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  3. If you want to see which of those scenarios plays out, I'd recommend you get to slinging some paint! I'm going with the medical community. A superbug will indeed, wipe out a huge segment, but oh just think how superior those of us who will be left are going to be!

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